Ikea Week: Achievement Unlocked

Bed Update: It is now a bed.

Bed!

Thanks to everyone who wrote with bed recommendations, especially Uncle Bob (who advocated for a Murphy) and Em (who recommended a box spring that doubles as a storage container). I'm glad that both of you are as reluctant as I am to give up the dream of owning Transformer furniture. Someday.

Further exploration of the premises has raised disturbing new questions about the apartment. Namely, how the hell did the lady who lived here before me get her hairs stuck to the bathroom wall above the damn mirror?

It curls like a beckoning finger, ushering the beholder into mystery.

Someone explained to me recently that many women, having longer hair than dudes, will stick strands of hair to the shower wall because otherwise the strands would cling to wet skin, in the revolting manner of long, wet hairs the world over. Well and good.

But how and why did someone stick her hair to bathroom walls well outside the shower and above head height? In multiple places? Did she climb furniture to do it? Did she routinely jump up after a shower and slap some hair on the wall in the manner of Georgetown's Hollis Thompson making a slam dunk? Was she a very tall person with terrifyingly long arms? Did the hair float up from the bathroom floor at night and cling to the wall through some combination of static and after hours California weather patterns?

These are the questions that haunt me after sunset as I lie on my Ikea bed and the traffic mutters by on Los Feliz Boulevard.